It’s never too late

Sitting in Starbucks, on a chilly but sunny Saturday afternoon, a fascinating woman allowed me to venture with her through the timeline of her life.

No words can describe how honored I felt to be able to sit across the table from her, witnessing her transparency and glaring intellect.

As the events of her life unfolded before my eyes, it became more apparent that her story needed to be heard. I’m just glad that she has allowed me to recap essential moments of her life.

Well, let’s take a look at a woman, who embodies the importance of redemption: Wenona Kelley.

A Chicago native and Woodlawn resident, Wenona was expected to walk into a promising future. In a place, where it was easy to become consumed by the activity of her community, which often included fighting and hustling, she was set apart as the “gifted one.”

It all started with her preschool teacher, Diane DeWoskin, who was the first to identify the gift in her. Wenona’s eyes lit up, as she remembered being placed in Headstart, working on projects, reading newspapers, and writing greeting cards.

It was that kind of dedication that allowed Wenona’s gift to be nurtured: something she holds dear to her heart.

Years later, Wenona entered high school. Like many gifted students, it was only appropriate for her to attend the prestigious Whitney Young Magnet High School.

Though this sounds like an experience that should be vastly admired, Wenona grew to subtly resent her uniqueness.

“I did not, at times, want to be who and what I was because that caused me to be set apart, at an early age. I took the school bus to schools. Back then, there was this thing, where school buses meant you were mentally incapacitated. But, I was actually being taken to a gifted school. They called me “school bus girl.” I did not like it. I wanted to be a part of the crowd. I loved people,” she said.

The social butterfly landed right in the midst of the crowd she desired to dwell in. From that point on, new doors opened in her life. To her dismay, Wenona found herself walking away from Whitney Young, to start a new journey at King High School.

“Some time around my sophomore year, things began to change. By the end of that year, I had already been in and out of in-house suspension. I had become one of the managers of the fro-soph basketball team. Toward the end, I had caused so much trouble that was not in alignment with the academic and integral standards of Whitney Young. They were just over it. I was given many chances. So, I ended up at King High School, in the hood, ” Wenona remembered.

There, the residue of her experiences at Whitney Young sparked a sense of entitlement. It was no surprise that she earned a spot in the Principal’s Scholars program, at King.

Again, though, her magnetic personality attracted a particular crowd. She joined the pom-pom squad and began to skip classes. With all of her intellect, she had to graduate out of summer school.

After those four years of grappling with her priorities, Wenona decided that it was time for a fresh start. However,  because of her mother’s income, she wasn’t able to qualify for the governmental funds for college.

Also, due to the rocky four years she endured in high school, it was difficult for her to earn scholarships. So, she made the decision to enlist in the National Guard, to help absorb some of the expenses for school.

She then applied for some grants and chose to attend Western Illinois University.

She had become fully invested in nurturing her own gift and was ready to pursue that promising future that was identified, early on.

That summer, after she graduated from high school, Wenona received a surprise she could never forget.

On July 4, 1985, Wenona met a young man, who she developed a relationship with. Three months later, she found out that she was pregnant.

She could not process how this had happened, during her “first time.” Having been brought up in a Christian household, abstinence was a value that was taught and expected to be upheld.

So, of course this was news that weighed heavy on her. Not only did this change her plans, but it also strained her relationship with her mother.

“This happened, while I was waiting to be assigned to basic training,” Wenona stated. “That was when it got difficult for my mother to handle, not unlike any loving and caring mother, who wants her children to do well. I think my mother literally walked past me, like we were in a bed and breakfast for about two weeks. She wasn’t able to deal with the reality of me not being able to go to school.”

At the time, Wenona felt as though her pregnancy was a hindrance to her life. This shift blocked her willingness to accept the idea of motherhood so much that she actually wanted to terminate the pregnancy.

However, any attempt she made was foiled.

Wenona had birthed a beautiful baby boy.

With a newborn, Wenona still lived her life. Because she’d lived in family household, she was able to leave her baby with people she trusted, whenever she wanted to go out.

In “living her life,” she faced multiple life-threatening situations. Where others would typically see opportunities to change their lives for the better, she dusted herself off and continued on.

“When I was walking down 66th street, with my Seattle Seahawks starter coat on, there was a brother behind me and one in front of me. The brother in front of me put a gun up to my head. In my mind, I was like, ‘God please don’t let me die. I have a baby.’ That was my prayer. But, when they took my ID, my wallet and my money, and let me go, I went to my boyfriend’s house and got drunk and high. I was cool again,” Wenona expressed.

Not every instance was as drastic as that one, but anytime she was in trouble — even the multiple arrests– up until the moment she decided to surrender, she said a foxhole prayer.

She always knew that it was God who had kept her alive, through all of the mess she was involved in. Because of that self-serving attitude that she’d kept, since high school, she felt like the world owed her something. So, it took her almost thirty years to finally submit to the God, who had continuously preserved her life.

Looking back, Wenona recognized that it was her mother and her son, who stood in the gap for her.

“I’m glad God gave me the parent He gave me. I’m glad He gave me the son He gave me,” Wenona shared. “Otherwise, I may not have made it. I’m thoroughly convinced that intercession saved my life. I just believe they were interceding for me.”

She believes that everything happened for a reason. She even gave credit to the penal system for the part it played in her transformation. On many occasions, her mother or son bailed her out, just in the nick of time.

But, the one last time she was arrested, God “put her on her back.”

During those few days she spent in the county, she confronted herself and realized that it was time for true self-inventory.

When she got out, she was more than willing to consider a change.

“I looked up at that ceiling, like ‘how did I get here? I’m Wenona Kelley: an intellect, a golden child. What has happened to my life?’…It had scared me so bad. So, I was more than willing to consider changing my life,” she declared. “Jail is the worst thing created in the history of the world. I don’t wish that on my worst enemy”.

Not only had God spared her life, over and over, but the people around her also remained supportive and loving. Through her process, she had learned that everything she did, good or bad, affected everyone around her.

Because her loved ones were affected the most by her decisions, she had to learn to be patient with their healing process, as they accepted her change.

Allowing God to be God in her life, as well as in theirs, was hard for her.

“I felt rejected when they didn’t applaud me. When I didn’t get calls everyday, from my only child, I felt bad, ” she revealed. “But, I needed to be grateful that they were still there for me.”

In Wenona’s transition, her only son and his wife had a baby. During that time, she had become convinced that they wouldn’t allow her to be a part of the baby’s life.

But, they did.

Her first granddaughter was six weeks old, when they first began to bring her around. That was an integral part of her transition.

“That baby helped to save my life, ” she said, with tears in her eyes.

The woman, who stands before us today, has not forgotten about her journey. Because of where she has been, she doesn’t turn her back on those who are often frowned upon and overlooked.

She has a heart for those, who inhabit the path she once dwelled upon.

The woman, who was once prideful and selfish, is now a loving grandmother of three beautiful grandchildren.

She has now found a comfortable place, in the will of God.

In the words of Wenona Kelley, “it’s okay to stop and start over. Even if you don’t know how to start over, just stop and look around. There’s always someone there to help you. Find your way back to God.”